matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize
