weddingsv make me drug and hornr
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
Randomize
