when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
