Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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