This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
His hands were made for my vagina.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Randomize
