when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Randomize