Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
