don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
