Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Randomize
