Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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