Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
