how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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