fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Randomize
