We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
