Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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