I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
