No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
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