Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I have peed in a lot of sinks
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
