also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
