So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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