ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
