dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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