I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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