How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize