Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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