She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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