going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize