If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Randomize
