You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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