i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Randomize
