I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
