Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
love makes seman taste better
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
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