My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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