Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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