what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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