tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
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