Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
