just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize