Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
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