i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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