PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
