Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
