waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize
