Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
