let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I supernannyed him into submission
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
