yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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