Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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