Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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