Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
