her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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