Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize